Trouble in Paradise

I thought by dating someone older I was ridding myself of all the second-guessing games. I thought when in true love my paranoia could rest easy. But here I am, laying in my bed, with my eyes wide open in so called love, trying everything in the book to put myself to sleep because I am too anxious, scared, and angry. Why are you doing this to me? I thought by taking the plunge and entering this relationship I had made sure I would never feel that weight on my chest, that shortage of breath a nd that haviness behind my eyes ever again. Maybe I don't understand love, maybe I'm too weak for it.

Because I felt my world collapsing for six hours.. six hours while he was... sleeping.