The beginning of the year and I’m already ceasing to care. It’s been a good start but after this summer I just feel incapable of writing essays or paying attention to things with no sentimental meaning to me. Love has also been one great distraction. There have been these terrible thoughts of dropping out and working and just throwing my life away. I need to get my head back out of the gutter. What scares me the most, is once again I’m not sure where these feelings are coming from or how to deal with them. That’s the one thing about my life is all the timing is off. All the right things at all the wrong times. Then again maybe there is a reason and a place for everything.

Been getting higher, been feeling better. But never losing my head.