Feels like a Molly flashback. I feel crazy.
I just spent the night with Adam and I feel so strange. We watched two movies, walked, smiled and talked about all the ways our experiments made us feel.
Can I blame Molly for the way I feel?
Do I need her again to regain the happiness I had the past couple of weeks...
What do I do? Where do I get help?
I just need a drink, but I can't because I stopped. Did I say need?..
What could possibly take me back to the place where I was a year or two ago? Or just a few months... I feel so crazy, like I'm living off animalistic feelings, to just want and never think. I'm exposing myself to everything that can harm a humans mind. When did all this start?
When did want become need?
A crazy person never admits to being crazy. So as long as I think I'm utterly insane I'm fine right? What's standing in the way of control?
My emotions have an echo, in so much space, and maybe it's not because I don't know enough, I probably just know too much. I need help, but I always said that if you can't help yourself then no one else can. Plus who understands a crazy person?
i like this.
ReplyDeleteif i was you i'd disregard that last quote 'if you can't help yourself...', its situational but for ex. reaching out would be a way to help yourself, and then take it from there. as cliche as that example sounds..
i used to think that way too till i ended up in the darkest hole that now i realize i only let myself create, dig deep, alone.
/on another note;
crazy is an Informal way of saying insane
and i believe we all are.
anywhoo.....
i wish for the best <3